Can't help but wonder how many pair of shoes will be worn out by the time morning comes. Pacing restlessly. Walking the streets aimlessly. Still alone more often then not. That ache is gnawing so much now that its hard not to just curl up in a fetal position and let them kick until the bones snap and the skin breaks to spill her life. But, finally, giving up for a bit and sitting. Close to the shop, she perches and sits on the edge of the alcove that led to the beach. Watching those that pass under her and go by on their on business. The wet plasters the dark curls and in tight long curls, the water hangs to dripdripdrip down onto her sodden clothing. She didn't care. It hid any tears that threatened to fall. Each time she looked up, she most likely was searching for a specific face. Hoping to see them walking towards her. But its never the one she wants to see.
A deep heavy sigh and she's reaching up to curl her finger up in a long strand of pitch black that hangs down around her face. A curl of icy white mist rising from her nostrils with each breath doesn't even hide her eyes from searching but it might hide her face from their eyes. She grimaces as she presses her hand to her gut and bends over a little more as if in pain, nearly enough that she could just pitch forward and crush her skull on the ground below her. But she's fallen for worse heights with minimal injury. The hunger was beginning to take its toll and she was starving. There wasn't anyone she could go to anymore..none that she use to feed from never around and uncertain she could handle any others'. A few deep breaths and she sits up a little more again, tries to ignore it.
The face swims up in her mind's eye again and she gives a wet shake of her head to clear the image. A faint whimper tearing from her lip that she clamps down hard enough to bust the flesh. The pain she remembers in the eyes as she was healed brought tears to her eyes again, just as they did last night. She never meant to get hurt. Always putting her best shoulder forward in a fight. But the demon she tangled with still smacked her down, tossed her against one wall and another like a rag doll. If not for her nature, she may of bleed to death, broken. But she forced all she had into it, the essence blazing like a nova as she tapped everything she had within her to force the wounds to be not so severe but it was too much damage and she couldn't hide the limping where she couldn't get her shin back into place, jeans tight thankfully held it all together with so many bandages its amazing she didn't starve her leg of its life. Inside the shop, she protested and just shy of threatened anyone that dared try to help her..it was her fault and mistake. Why should they waste energy and time on her small wounds when there's other things to be done. So she kept still as much as possible. Head down to hide her face, eyes, tears as she walked around as normal as she could. But in the end it didn't do any good. Refusing to listen to her. Worried and near to tears, insisting to fix what I didn't have the energy to finish up. Even after everything was taken care of and torn with guilt, she held onto them with a tight grip before her vision went and she went to the floor in a dead faint.
The first thing that came to mind when she woke up was not how she got in her bed and tucked in but if everything was alright. The pain having to endure that come from herself still bit into her heart and she spent most the day fretting until she ends up sitting out in the rain with tears spilling down her cheeks.
Utter alone-ness and too many emotions crashing in on her. She didn't want to feed. Didn't wish to bother anyone. The alcohol she was tired of. It did nothing for her. She wanted to hurl anymore even when a glass was set before her. She sighs and lifts her head to look off across the land that she could see, the blue eyes paler in her dark face. This is how she spent her night..
Friday, September 26, 2008
Monday, September 22, 2008
What's the Directive?
The face in the mirror started back at the twin, bright blue eyes like liquid plasma looking back with an intent stare, the dark shadows barely giving the highlights cast by the lamp burning near at hand. The dark hair around the figure's face just as dark as the shadows around them and curling wetly around the face. Even leaning closer doesn't reveal much, as if the face isn't clearly defined. Just the large pale electric blue eyes dominating. A pursed lip is all it takes and the image is becoming indistinct as it frosts over the mirror's surface so its just a blurry outline with a halo caused by the lamplight.
The demon turns in their seat and looks at the cluttered table again. Just taking in the mess of mismatched instruments, computer parts and books stacked haphazardly in piles. The long thick tapering tail jerks behind and whips around the chair's leg until they finally push up off the seat to head over to the table. Leaning slight weight against the old, battered antique bit of furniture saved from a trash heap in town. A computer screen perched close to the edge of the table has them moving forward and lifting the slender ebook to set in a safer spot further over and drops into the rickety old chair that makes them feel like its going to snap and crack under the force of being sat upon. The demon knocks on the table's wooden surface, can't take chances, is their thought. Looking at the screen while slumping in the chair, the demon's eyes watches over the image in view and for a moment, there's a bright white grin showing in the black field before it disappears while leaning forward and moving to another page.
Lips move at first, not a breath shown in a billow of white before the face, then " Ripple Effect is something to be .....due to a keen sense of bring......adversity, even the smallest things in life..." The silence that follows once more is given to silently reading to themselves with a small frown beginning to develop. Leaning forward further to rest against the table with a propped up elbow, the eyes moves slowly over the words on the screen before jerking over to the side in thought while their finger tapped on the edge of the table. " Entropic force...inside him?..the injury?..the taint of the curse or was it the assault itself.." There's a growl and they turn back to touch the screen, dragging around other windows. Going over slowly on some.
The hour was growing late and already the demon's eyes were growing heavy, hand lifted to cover the yawn threatening to escape, a small nodding as they try to read the glyphs moving around, trying to focus them into stillness so she could learn but after the fourth effort to steady the letters, it was time to give up. The demon shut the laptop off and closed the lid before pulling themselves out of their chair and over to the bed where they finally spill over the colorful comforter with a tired moan and grimacing. Too tired even to roll over, they just draw their legs up and curls up this way, like an infant with tail spilling down between their feet and over the comforter where it hangs limp. Small hands wedge themselves up against their belly low and frowns again in discomfort, eyes moving to the carved box that held 12 vials within it, carefully protected by cloth folded over the top to cushion them all. They realize its not something they're looking forward but anymore..its better to be safe then sorry. Too many accidents and mishaps. It was time to take further responsibility and prevent more trouble. In spite the rising need to let nature take its course, this demon finds themselves still afraid. With luck, a few more days will pass and they'll be able to take the first dose and not have to worry about the next until a month later. For now though, sleep was more wanted and after kicking shoes off and starts stripping to climb under the covers, there's not much in mind but a desire of wanting to be held while sleeping. With this, the demon drifts off with a sigh and slips into sweep oblivion.
The demon turns in their seat and looks at the cluttered table again. Just taking in the mess of mismatched instruments, computer parts and books stacked haphazardly in piles. The long thick tapering tail jerks behind and whips around the chair's leg until they finally push up off the seat to head over to the table. Leaning slight weight against the old, battered antique bit of furniture saved from a trash heap in town. A computer screen perched close to the edge of the table has them moving forward and lifting the slender ebook to set in a safer spot further over and drops into the rickety old chair that makes them feel like its going to snap and crack under the force of being sat upon. The demon knocks on the table's wooden surface, can't take chances, is their thought. Looking at the screen while slumping in the chair, the demon's eyes watches over the image in view and for a moment, there's a bright white grin showing in the black field before it disappears while leaning forward and moving to another page.
Lips move at first, not a breath shown in a billow of white before the face, then " Ripple Effect is something to be .....due to a keen sense of bring......adversity, even the smallest things in life..." The silence that follows once more is given to silently reading to themselves with a small frown beginning to develop. Leaning forward further to rest against the table with a propped up elbow, the eyes moves slowly over the words on the screen before jerking over to the side in thought while their finger tapped on the edge of the table. " Entropic force...inside him?..the injury?..the taint of the curse or was it the assault itself.." There's a growl and they turn back to touch the screen, dragging around other windows. Going over slowly on some.
The hour was growing late and already the demon's eyes were growing heavy, hand lifted to cover the yawn threatening to escape, a small nodding as they try to read the glyphs moving around, trying to focus them into stillness so she could learn but after the fourth effort to steady the letters, it was time to give up. The demon shut the laptop off and closed the lid before pulling themselves out of their chair and over to the bed where they finally spill over the colorful comforter with a tired moan and grimacing. Too tired even to roll over, they just draw their legs up and curls up this way, like an infant with tail spilling down between their feet and over the comforter where it hangs limp. Small hands wedge themselves up against their belly low and frowns again in discomfort, eyes moving to the carved box that held 12 vials within it, carefully protected by cloth folded over the top to cushion them all. They realize its not something they're looking forward but anymore..its better to be safe then sorry. Too many accidents and mishaps. It was time to take further responsibility and prevent more trouble. In spite the rising need to let nature take its course, this demon finds themselves still afraid. With luck, a few more days will pass and they'll be able to take the first dose and not have to worry about the next until a month later. For now though, sleep was more wanted and after kicking shoes off and starts stripping to climb under the covers, there's not much in mind but a desire of wanting to be held while sleeping. With this, the demon drifts off with a sigh and slips into sweep oblivion.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Up in Smoke
It becomes too much, exhaustion dragging her down as soon as she sat down in the chair when she made it to Haven. The loud crack of her forehead landing on the clothed table barely cushions the white pain it causes her, the dizziness and sparkles behind her closed eyes playing over her blind view. She couldn't hold off anymore and her body sagged forward, Nerissa almost passing out as she feels her strength trickling like water through her fingers would, the intense day leaving her utterly drained in the end. Its times like this she wants to cry, needing a pair of strong arms around her, but tries to keep from her mind the days that's gone by and she's been left alone and wanting for comfort. Tears well up and she tears her mind off her selfishness, thinking over all that's happened as soon as she'd stepped onto the stairs leading to the shop.
A pure maddening day, she arrives to a few gathered around the shop, talking amongst themselves. She didn't know the red demon male or the two females around him talking and goes to sit down on the ledge before the window. She sees Mako and throws a wave to her before she notices Ethan standing there. "Ya needin' something Ethan?" Neri turns her head up to look at him. "Or ya waitin' on someone?"
Mako Nozaki notices Neri waking up, "Good morning, sister"
Ethan Seelowe looks closer at neri narrowing his eyes only her voice giving her identity away "you never seeze to amaze with your appearance Neri... I was indeed waiting on someone... but it seems I will have to wait a bit more"
She stretches hard. "Mornin' Mako." Neri, again, glances over towards Ethan and nods slowly. " Change of mood I suppose...Either way, whoever yer waitin' for will show up sooner or later." She crawls to her feet and waves, remembering she has a few things needing done.
When she returns later that morning, she hears her coven brother talking to someone, stopping on the stair case and listening absently before she entered, the familiar sound of Chlo's voice coming to her easily. She makes a step to the side to avoid a collision as the feline takes off out of the store and turns back to look at him again with the sounds of her bike carrying her off. Mako's there again and greets putting her hand on her hat "Hello, Hadyn"
Nerissa turns to look at Hadyn behind her, still showing no improvement to mood, but waves to him tiredly.Mako Nozaki grins "Did you notice a cardboard at the corner of the lab?" Nerissa shakes her head. "Not been inside yet..why?"
"A few days ago, I went to the Den, and laved the water from the fountain in there." Mako starts explaining. Hadyn happens to say while he turns to hand Neri something, "Didn't see anything..." Blinking, the demon looks at the stuffed fox, hearing him say, "Now cheer up." Which she gives a tired smile and wraps her arms around it, using its head as a pillow for her chin to rest on and goes back to listening to Mako.
"I explain the packs that is research objectives. If you want to inspect it, you can use them but I need it for some purpose." Hadyn Bellic smiles mischiveously
Neri's smiles as she looks at it before a laugh comes from her. She looks back at him with a slight flush to her cheeks and turns back to Mako, trying to listen to her but she must of nodded off sometime later. By the time she wakes up, its only her and Hadyn again at the shop and he has some odd beast on the ground, trying to use a crooked hook to pin a head down to the pavement of the street; which isn't easy with the three snake heads trying to latch fangs into him. "Hey." He says, when he notices her stirring, and she gives a brief hey back in return, watching him. Pointing, he asks, "Think that will keep the Prowlers away?" She blinks and scoots away, murmuring, "Uh...maybe?"
He continues talking to her, "I suppose one of us should check on that Ryder that came in earlier..." Neri looks up. "Huh?" She looks more then a little more then confused. "A ryder came in asking for some herbs..." He looks at her when she told him, "Oh..didn't know that." She finds it hard to concentrate and her brow furrows while she watches him mess with the creature, listening to him talk. "Having flashbacks and stuff and wanted to forget them."
"What kind?" She asks, then, "Oh..."
"Not sure exactly." He says. "Pix had left the bag under the counter." Neri turns a little as if to look back inside then returns her attention on him, "I see..well..I guess."
For a while, they chitchat, "Have ya heard anything about the hack the Cyber guys are sufferin'?"
"First I've heard of it." He looks up for a moment. "How are you feeling? You were a bit down last night." Nerissa shrugs a little as she glances over. "Still am.." She murmurs. When he slips his arm over her shoulders she tenses up slightly, the single word spoken made her seem to deflate instantly.
"Do you want my honest thoughts on this or should I just shut up?"
Nerissa glances over. "Go ahead..I doubt I can get anymore depressed."
She listened to him and sighs, seeing someone passing, her little brother heading down the street before she turns back and says, replying to his comment, ""He's busy..that's all..He can't help it." About that moment a stranger come in, passing them on the stairs to enter the shop. Neri can't help but feel a moments relief as she turns to take care of this woman, just randomly rambling without really thinking as she answered questions, making another comment to Hadyn who had been behind her about finding someone that could read the tarot deck, or least find out who can. Her attention is broken when she hears Hadyn mumble something about something always interupting. She just stands there in confused state, brow furrowing with thoughts but she just says, "I never did find out who was lookin' for me yesterday. Feline and pink doesn't sum it up much.."
The demon looks back again to finish with the customer with Hadyn saying behind her, "Listen Ner... what I'm going to say is gonna sound kinda bad so I don't want to just say it and rush off. Hadyn gives her a quick hug, "Please talk to me though before you do anything rash like leave us." He chucks her shoulder gently. "Or I'll go off and join the shadows or something equally as stupid."
The frown is hard as she looks over. "You do and I'll never talk to you.."
She sighs, "I have to go. I think Ang might be in some trouble." Splitting up, she doesn't bother watching him leave and heads off towards the Ryder's garage, finding Nicholas standing and waiting for her. They talk in hushed tones, her little brother making comments about what's going on and scowls when she looks over, watching Ang being threatened by a female ryder that seems to find a reason to draw her blade against the angel in white. Instantly, she feels her brother's hand gripping her to keep her beside him and they watch as the angel puts the ryder down on her knees in defeat. She leaves, cussing under her breath, while hearing Ang say to the young woman, "Please do not do that again. The next time I will not show mercy."
Her feet takes her to the bar and she doesn't even move to avoid a collision with some passing vampire, nearly bowling her over in passing to enter Haven, where she goes to dance and distract herself and her mood swings. There's another woman that joins her but she gives her no attenion, just moving to the sound of the music playing, loosing herself and forcing tired muscles to relax and just enjoy the near emptiness of the bar. It takes her a moment to realize an old friend is there, still feeling an awe at the change physically seen in the man's appearance. She calls him over to her, thankful when he agrees to it. While she dances, he watches, but there's nothing between them except two talking in tones just enough to carry to one another about what she'd noticed and heard so far, from Chlo coming to get the herbal package to what seems to of happened at the garage. At first he didn't seem to much care but the longer he listened he finally seemed to agree with her. This way they continue to talk until they both leave for their own duties.
It took a while to get what was going on and she was a little messed up with stress rising by the time she managed to clue her Sisters in on what was going on too. Coran had come, nearly panicked and asking for her help specifically to fix the spell that was hitting not just Chlo but the rest of the Ryders in one manner or another and each not the greatest of results once inflicted. Neri pushes her hands up into her hair and they talk who they could help, what would need to do to counter this botched spell she unleashed to rid herself of memories that was tormenting her and now they're stuck fixing it all.
How many hours had passed before they finally come up with a plan to cover all the inflicted in a way that they could cover more ground beyond the garage itself because there were so many around when a few of the girls had gone to investigate in depth the area.
After preperations, mixing things, they all carrying with them beehive smokers, the idea was to use the herbal mix made to counter the spell and smoke the area out with it. More then a few times they had to physical grab a few of the worse to get them to inhale the fumes of the herbs, moving from one individual to the next. When she stood outside the library, remembering that three Omegans had been there, she steels herself and pushes up into the building where she tiredly deposits what is left of her oil soaked herbs into the fireplace and use her own small reserve to plug the opening to 'fumigate' the library itself with backwash smoke sweeping out and enveloping everyone around. The demon doesn't stay to see if it worked, knowing that others treated had showed improvement so leaves Fate and hope that they'll be safe as she drags herself back to the Voodoo shop where she collaspes in back on the carpet to rest in dead silence, not even hearing the other's outside talking amongst themselves.
Restlessness doesn't have her there long and she goes outside, looking around to find very little of her Family left before finally ending up in Haven by herself. Now, she finds herself walking back to the shop, tail literally dragging along behind her on the ground with a hollow clop of her hooves on the pavement.
A pure maddening day, she arrives to a few gathered around the shop, talking amongst themselves. She didn't know the red demon male or the two females around him talking and goes to sit down on the ledge before the window. She sees Mako and throws a wave to her before she notices Ethan standing there. "Ya needin' something Ethan?" Neri turns her head up to look at him. "Or ya waitin' on someone?"
Mako Nozaki notices Neri waking up, "Good morning, sister"
Ethan Seelowe looks closer at neri narrowing his eyes only her voice giving her identity away "you never seeze to amaze with your appearance Neri... I was indeed waiting on someone... but it seems I will have to wait a bit more"
She stretches hard. "Mornin' Mako." Neri, again, glances over towards Ethan and nods slowly. " Change of mood I suppose...Either way, whoever yer waitin' for will show up sooner or later." She crawls to her feet and waves, remembering she has a few things needing done.
When she returns later that morning, she hears her coven brother talking to someone, stopping on the stair case and listening absently before she entered, the familiar sound of Chlo's voice coming to her easily. She makes a step to the side to avoid a collision as the feline takes off out of the store and turns back to look at him again with the sounds of her bike carrying her off. Mako's there again and greets putting her hand on her hat "Hello, Hadyn"
Nerissa turns to look at Hadyn behind her, still showing no improvement to mood, but waves to him tiredly.Mako Nozaki grins "Did you notice a cardboard at the corner of the lab?" Nerissa shakes her head. "Not been inside yet..why?"
"A few days ago, I went to the Den, and laved the water from the fountain in there." Mako starts explaining. Hadyn happens to say while he turns to hand Neri something, "Didn't see anything..." Blinking, the demon looks at the stuffed fox, hearing him say, "Now cheer up." Which she gives a tired smile and wraps her arms around it, using its head as a pillow for her chin to rest on and goes back to listening to Mako.
"I explain the packs that is research objectives. If you want to inspect it, you can use them but I need it for some purpose." Hadyn Bellic smiles mischiveously
Neri's smiles as she looks at it before a laugh comes from her. She looks back at him with a slight flush to her cheeks and turns back to Mako, trying to listen to her but she must of nodded off sometime later. By the time she wakes up, its only her and Hadyn again at the shop and he has some odd beast on the ground, trying to use a crooked hook to pin a head down to the pavement of the street; which isn't easy with the three snake heads trying to latch fangs into him. "Hey." He says, when he notices her stirring, and she gives a brief hey back in return, watching him. Pointing, he asks, "Think that will keep the Prowlers away?" She blinks and scoots away, murmuring, "Uh...maybe?"
He continues talking to her, "I suppose one of us should check on that Ryder that came in earlier..." Neri looks up. "Huh?" She looks more then a little more then confused. "A ryder came in asking for some herbs..." He looks at her when she told him, "Oh..didn't know that." She finds it hard to concentrate and her brow furrows while she watches him mess with the creature, listening to him talk. "Having flashbacks and stuff and wanted to forget them."
"What kind?" She asks, then, "Oh..."
"Not sure exactly." He says. "Pix had left the bag under the counter." Neri turns a little as if to look back inside then returns her attention on him, "I see..well..I guess."
For a while, they chitchat, "Have ya heard anything about the hack the Cyber guys are sufferin'?"
"First I've heard of it." He looks up for a moment. "How are you feeling? You were a bit down last night." Nerissa shrugs a little as she glances over. "Still am.." She murmurs. When he slips his arm over her shoulders she tenses up slightly, the single word spoken made her seem to deflate instantly.
"Do you want my honest thoughts on this or should I just shut up?"
Nerissa glances over. "Go ahead..I doubt I can get anymore depressed."
She listened to him and sighs, seeing someone passing, her little brother heading down the street before she turns back and says, replying to his comment, ""He's busy..that's all..He can't help it." About that moment a stranger come in, passing them on the stairs to enter the shop. Neri can't help but feel a moments relief as she turns to take care of this woman, just randomly rambling without really thinking as she answered questions, making another comment to Hadyn who had been behind her about finding someone that could read the tarot deck, or least find out who can. Her attention is broken when she hears Hadyn mumble something about something always interupting. She just stands there in confused state, brow furrowing with thoughts but she just says, "I never did find out who was lookin' for me yesterday. Feline and pink doesn't sum it up much.."
The demon looks back again to finish with the customer with Hadyn saying behind her, "Listen Ner... what I'm going to say is gonna sound kinda bad so I don't want to just say it and rush off. Hadyn gives her a quick hug, "Please talk to me though before you do anything rash like leave us." He chucks her shoulder gently. "Or I'll go off and join the shadows or something equally as stupid."
The frown is hard as she looks over. "You do and I'll never talk to you.."
She sighs, "I have to go. I think Ang might be in some trouble." Splitting up, she doesn't bother watching him leave and heads off towards the Ryder's garage, finding Nicholas standing and waiting for her. They talk in hushed tones, her little brother making comments about what's going on and scowls when she looks over, watching Ang being threatened by a female ryder that seems to find a reason to draw her blade against the angel in white. Instantly, she feels her brother's hand gripping her to keep her beside him and they watch as the angel puts the ryder down on her knees in defeat. She leaves, cussing under her breath, while hearing Ang say to the young woman, "Please do not do that again. The next time I will not show mercy."
Her feet takes her to the bar and she doesn't even move to avoid a collision with some passing vampire, nearly bowling her over in passing to enter Haven, where she goes to dance and distract herself and her mood swings. There's another woman that joins her but she gives her no attenion, just moving to the sound of the music playing, loosing herself and forcing tired muscles to relax and just enjoy the near emptiness of the bar. It takes her a moment to realize an old friend is there, still feeling an awe at the change physically seen in the man's appearance. She calls him over to her, thankful when he agrees to it. While she dances, he watches, but there's nothing between them except two talking in tones just enough to carry to one another about what she'd noticed and heard so far, from Chlo coming to get the herbal package to what seems to of happened at the garage. At first he didn't seem to much care but the longer he listened he finally seemed to agree with her. This way they continue to talk until they both leave for their own duties.
It took a while to get what was going on and she was a little messed up with stress rising by the time she managed to clue her Sisters in on what was going on too. Coran had come, nearly panicked and asking for her help specifically to fix the spell that was hitting not just Chlo but the rest of the Ryders in one manner or another and each not the greatest of results once inflicted. Neri pushes her hands up into her hair and they talk who they could help, what would need to do to counter this botched spell she unleashed to rid herself of memories that was tormenting her and now they're stuck fixing it all.
How many hours had passed before they finally come up with a plan to cover all the inflicted in a way that they could cover more ground beyond the garage itself because there were so many around when a few of the girls had gone to investigate in depth the area.
After preperations, mixing things, they all carrying with them beehive smokers, the idea was to use the herbal mix made to counter the spell and smoke the area out with it. More then a few times they had to physical grab a few of the worse to get them to inhale the fumes of the herbs, moving from one individual to the next. When she stood outside the library, remembering that three Omegans had been there, she steels herself and pushes up into the building where she tiredly deposits what is left of her oil soaked herbs into the fireplace and use her own small reserve to plug the opening to 'fumigate' the library itself with backwash smoke sweeping out and enveloping everyone around. The demon doesn't stay to see if it worked, knowing that others treated had showed improvement so leaves Fate and hope that they'll be safe as she drags herself back to the Voodoo shop where she collaspes in back on the carpet to rest in dead silence, not even hearing the other's outside talking amongst themselves.
Restlessness doesn't have her there long and she goes outside, looking around to find very little of her Family left before finally ending up in Haven by herself. Now, she finds herself walking back to the shop, tail literally dragging along behind her on the ground with a hollow clop of her hooves on the pavement.
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